I Was Born Electric!

Ya know how there are some things that happen to you that in hind sight you can see all the pieces of that particular puzzle, and you are like, "Duh!"  Well, there is a particular puzzle that I have been attempting to put together, and have only recently been able to understand the picture.

Since I was a child, I have had "energy issues." I made a full on post about this here. In addition to the findings that I discussed here (i.e, SlIders and Indigo children), I believe I may have new information about my own case.

Last night, I walked by the refrigerator, and reached up to grab something on top of it.  I lightly brushed against it, only to be shocked horribly by it. This was not just a simple shock, but enough to actually hurt for about 10 minutes!  Distraught at this horrible occurrence, I asked my SO to "test" it. He touched all over the dang thing, and no reaction!  Baffling....

Mulling this incident over in my mind, I remember that there are multiple items that seem to shock me, but have never shocked another person, to my knowledge.  My washing machine is one culprit.  Another is a friend's blender that seemed to vibrate with electrical current.  I told him to toss it because it was dangerous, but being the cheap bastard he is, he decided to just be careful with it.  He later informed me that I "must be crazy, that thing never shocked me!"

One might wonder if this is akin to static electricity, in effect.  I did consider this.  However, I have never really had much issue with that.  People I know complain about having too much static electricity, and not being able to touch such things as car doors.  This has never been a problem for me. 

Taking this into account, and all the previous information, I have formulated a theory.  Perhaps people like myself have a way of conducting electricity.  Either that, or we are able to draw electricity from such appliances.  What are the possibilities I haven't considered?  Could this be my Super Hero Secret Super Power?  You can call me Lady Electric!!

What's Goin' On? What's Goin' On....

Last night was the night that Our Coven met to celebrate Yule, or Winter Solstice.  In the chaos of the holidays, we were unable to plan our ritual.  We considered just 'winging' it, but it proved to be better that we didn't, what with kids and chores and such.  We did, however, get to enjoy each others' company, a treat we had not indulged in for close to two months.  One of us has been absent each time we have met recently.......

It was great to have very personal and insightful conversations again.  There are those few people in one's life that you feel you can open up and share anything with, my Covenmates are that for me. We exchanged stories of our happenings, as well as exchanging the most carefully thought out gifts.  It was truly a blessing to spend time with these extraordinary women.  Winter has come, a time for drawing deeper in, and I and my dear friends are ready to support one another in that.  I am blessed.

Odin - All Father

I have worked with Freyja for a long time. I was initially drawn to the Norse pantheon when I began my witchery almost 20 years ago.  Though I was drawn to the Norse, I was perhaps a bit hesitant to work with Odin. It is apparent that he is not a god to be taken lightly.  In the mythology, it is plain that he always gets what he wants, and is willing to go to any lengths to make that statement correct.  Perhaps I was intimidated by him, I cannot say for sure.

Anyway, as I have dedicated myself to the Norse for a year and a day, I have not taken this on lightly.  I have jumped in and am fully immersed in Nordic magick study and practice.  This means that I have begun working with Odin himself.

Odin is a powerful god, and I am glad that I waited to really work with him.  I feel that only now am I at the proper place to truly know him.  Each time I have evoked him I have felt his power throughout my body. Most recently, I asked of him a gift. 

According to Nordic tradition, a gift must never go unreciprocated. I asked Odin's assistance in a working, and in return, I promised a gift to him.  As part of my working, I made a particular bind rune to symbolize the request and desired effect.  My end of the bargain was yesterday, unfulfilled.  During this interim, the wood round onto which I burnt the runes began bowing in upon itself. I didn't really think much of it at the time.  I blamed it on humidity.  However, I began to fulfill on my end of the bargain today, and now the round is flat again.

Coincidence?  I think not....

Wolfen Spirit Warrior

Today I went to a magickally inclined shop. While there I received an overload of energy.  I am not certain if the amount of energy that I took in was way too much, or if it was just not all good energy.  For most of the day I felt high and slowly began feeling achy all over.  My kidneys especially began hurting.  None of it really made much sense to me, but I felt the need to lay down.

Expecting to relax, I just laid down for a moment and was immediately drawn into a deep trance or vision. I was laying down beside my daughter as she played, but her presence was not noticed by me during this time.  Snow Dragon Lady came to me, she spoke to me directly for the first time. Her words were exactly this: "You have been shapeshifting for longer than you remember.  Then she started introducing several people to me.  I don't recall all of their names, but the last one Wolfen Spirit Warrior.

Dormant, but Still Living

Last night, I had a dream.  This occurrence is common of most of my nights, but I find last night's dream to be very significant.  It truly speaks to me....

Last night I entered the same cave that I wrote about just a short while back, the one with celestite walls.  This time I entered as my human self.  I walked into the cave, stirring up all sorts of living beings as I moved.  Once I walked far enough, the Ibis was there.  I stood and watched her for a while, before venturing on.

As I walked, the cave went from relatively dark to light, with the light filtering beautifully through the celestite, casting a pale blue color throughout the cave.  I walked up to the water that trickled across the floor of the cave and lifted handfuls to my mouth and sipped the cool, refreshing water.

I looked up to see a large tree before me.  The tree was not dead, but was definitely in a mode of dormancy.  I kept looking at the tree, wishing it would bloom, and be vibrant.... but here is where it gets tricky.  I am a very lucid dreamer, and I am unsure how much of the last parts I "influenced," and how much I actually let play out.....

I began looking at the tree, and saw a few small buds on the branches.  Then it became a tree full of life, color, and fruit - something akin to a peach.  I climbed the tree to get at the fruit.  As I tasted it, it was so juicy and sweet.  I savored a few bites, then looked around to realize *I* had become the tree.

Would you believe, I know what this all means?

Hail Odin!

There are blossoms on the "tree" I planted a few days ago during the full moon. My sister, Corvidae, and I did a working that concerned our own creativity.  It was definitely a working of great value to both of us.

It has been a couple of days since we did the ritual, and I have only just sat down in a space where I could relax and "listen."  Well, that is not entirely true, I have spent the weekend doing some very deep, personal growth work.  That was where my concentration was focused.  However, now I am sitting at my computer, able to take in other matters.

While sitting today, a spirit made its presence known beside me.  She carried with her a message.  I was told to put aside my material concerns, and to look deeper into matters of a spiritual nature.  That is where my attentions should be focused.  In addition, I would be receiving assistance from an unexpected source, as well as from my ancestors/guides......

Interesting....

Truly enjoying this very exciting life I live.

Daily Readings...

Each day I do a Rune and Tarot card meditation.  I pull one card to discern the environment of the day, what I should focus on; I also pull one rune for this.  Today I decided to pull three cards and two runes.  Why? Because it felt right. 

Cards of the day: 

1. To signify Me, I pulled Six of Wands
2. To signify the Environment, I pulled Ten of Pentacles
3. To further qualify the second card, I pulled the King of Pentacles

In light of recent events, this is a very hopeful reading.  I have been seeing this come into being, and I am thankful...

For the Runes:

1. Ansuz
2. Othala

This is extremely interesting in light of yesterday's meditation, and last night's dream.  

In Dreams I Walk with You.....

 

Last night I dreamt that I was looking out from the eyes of a dragon, I was the dragon. My home was a cave whose walls were lined with celestite, and beside me stood an Ibis.

Gifts Handed Down

Meditation for me lately has been super powerful.  My coven sister, Corvidae, led a rune meditation on Saturday.  This was on both the runes Uruz and Fehu (see Paxson's book Taking Up the Runes).  In the middle of the meditation, you are told to take a look at the things that are holding you back from gaining prosperity.  What I saw when I looked at this was a woman, who very much resembled my mother, handing a child (that definitely was not me) a gift.  At that point, I was terribly confused.  As I had done a ritual for prosperity the day before, I felt that prosperity must already given to me, and that there were no obstacles standing in my way.

I got home that afternoon from Miss Corvidae's house and decided to pick a rune from my set, at random.  Of course you can guess which rune it was that I chose. That's right - Gebo, meaning Gift.  I began to think that there might be more to this vision that what initially came to mind.  Still unsure, I decided to sit on the information for a couple of days.

This morning, I sat down in my darkened room and decided to meditate.  I wanted to journey with my spirit guides. I had no set purpose for this meditation, only to learn and see.  When I got to one of my sacred spaces, I was sitting in the middle of my grassy field near my favorite weeping willow.  Beside me was one of my totems, a frog.  I looked at him and wondered what he was doing there, what he might have to teach me.  At that moment he went off and plunged into the water.  Not hesitating, I did that same.  I swam over to the waterfall that is just up the stream, luxuriating in the feel of the water.

I enjoyed the space for a time, then Sitting Eagle came and visited me.  As I got out of the water, he gave me dry garments to wear. (It always amuses me that my guides dress me in animals skins, give me fur robes, etc. because being a strict vegetarian, it is not clothing I would choose for myself.)  He then began walking with me. 

I asked my guide to tell me what was going on in my meditation, what did "gift" mean to my prosperity.  He told me that I needed to use my gifts, gifts that had been handed down for generations.  "What gifts are those?" I asked.  He did not answer me but told me to count my prosperity and riches in more than the material world.  I then told him that I was doing that, or trying to, and that I was doing my best to follow my spiritual path and grow in wisdom. I then asked if I was on the right track.  His response was not a no, but he didn't say 'yes' either.......

So, now I am left to figure out what gifts I have been suppressing and ignoring that have been handed down for generations......

The Dragon is Waking

I have never studied draconian magick before.  Oh, well, of course there was that one time..... but I had never really studied it before.  However, as my dreams have recently been telling me that this is the time for doing so, I have begun in earnest.

Recently I ran across a book about Norse Draconian Magick.  I was terribly excited by this, as it falls in line with my current studies and dedication to the Norse Gods.  Having only gotten about 1/3 of the way through the studies, you can take my criticisms as you will, but I am not certain that I completely jive with this fellow's ideas.  He is definitely very educated on the subject, but he is a dude, writing from that perspective.  We women approach the world and the creatures within it in an entirely different manner.

The author of the book identifies two primary Norse deities that are associated with this form of magick.  They are Odin and Freya.  Having worked very closely with Freya, and really feeling tied to her in particular, I feel that my understanding of her is different than his.  I do not attribute that to error, but more just the difference between male and female understanding, approach, etc.

I have not given up on this book; it is chock full of useful and well thought out information.  The author is definitely well practiced also.  I will continue to follow this path, but I shall trust my own intuition and look to my teacher, Freya, to fill in where I see blanks.

Outcome = Uncertain

Today I am uncertain, and perhaps a bit emotional.  My SO is going to see a rheumatologist.  It is uncertain what he may expect, only that the possibilities before him do not look very good.  It is also uncertain, once he talks to a specialist, if he will know anything new, only that this doctor is well equipped to answer the questions as yet unanswered.

 I knew all of this going into my meditation.  I began burning frankincense and sat down to do the very same meditation that I did yesterday, because the results were so intense, and I felt I needed the boost in energies.  I was able to do the Middle Pillar very easily, not as easily as yesterday, but easier than most.  However, when I started to meditate on the tetragrammaton, I was unable.

As I said the first letter, Yud, my attentions went elsewhere entirely.  I became (that's right, became) a golden eagle.  (I had thought I was a hawk, until I google imaged and found out instead I was an eagle.)  I soared through the air and loved every minute of it.  I thought about never coming down, but then I landed on a tree.  The eagle that I was stopped listening to my thoughts when some small creature, probably a mouse, scampered below.  The eagle went after it.  Really great to be a bird of prey when I have been a vegetarian all my life, *she says sarcastically.*  Anyway, the lesson there is that there is a cycle to life, and it cannot be stopped.  We do not choose whether or not to participate, it is simply there.  Life will go on regardless, and the cycle will continue. 

That is not the end though.  My hollow bone ancestor and spirit guide, Sitting Eagle (yes of course, I get it) came to me and hugged me.  He wrapped a blanket about my shoulders and talked to me.  I asked him about my SO.  He said that he could not tell me that everything was/is going to be alright.  I don't know if this meant that he does not know, or whether he is unable to let me know at this times.  Whatever the case, we walked and I did not press him on the subject.

As we walked, we began to pass a countless long line of people doing various things, almost as if watching a move reel backward.  I surmised now that this was the line of my SO's ancestors, because we stopped when we came to a HUGE tree.  I mean, this tree was so big it could rival Yggdrasil.   Looking back, the tree had no leaves, but looked like it was dormant for winter.

Sitting Eagle looked at me and said, "Remember, energy can heal.  You must fill this tree with light."  I was stunned, "But, the tree is so big.  I am not ready. How can I do that?......"  I sat down to try, when the small alarm on my phone went off saying that I must prepare to work.

(interesting that all of this took place in an hour, but felt like 5 minutes...)

The Unclear Questions

Today is a time for shaking off the old burdens and habits, a time for asking the questions whose answers were previously unclear.......That is what I was told in this morning's tarot meditation.  Tarot meditation is something I do almost every day, ritually.  Today was, however, rather different. For one, I did a three card spread, instead of just choosing one card.  I felt this was necessary in light of certain events that have occurred recently.

After doing my brief reading, I journeyed on my day as usual.  I did my yoga, then settled down to do meditation.  I have been reading a book titled Kabbalah and Meditation by Aryeh Kaplan. This particular book is amazing.  I am only about 3 chapters in, but I have learned so much already and am excited about that journey.  As such, I decided to chant YHVH while doing my usual chakra meditation.

Often, when I meditate, I journey with my spirit guides. Today, however, I focused on the Middle Pillar exercise, charging all of my chakras top-down.  Normally, when I do this, I take some time to fully experience each chakra and fill it full of light.  This meditation was different in that I did not have to focus on them, they filled up like water and flowed over rapidly into the next until they were all vibrating.

After filling my chakras, I focused on the name of G-D.  I repeated over and over the names of the letters that comprise God's name.  I cannot describe this feeling, or anything I saw or experienced, but it was beautiful and rich.  I wanted to stay in meditation much longer than I did, but alas.... work, the mundane, calls.....

What does (blank) Mean to You?

A friend of mine, whom I met for coffee this morn, is going through some intensive therapy, and so we often speak of various lessons he as learned as a result. Recently, his therapist spoke to him about "programs."  She told him that we are all running on various programs.  That is why we tend to replay similar situations in our life. For instance, we all know that one person that keeps dating all the wrong characters, all abusive (or insert other such character flaw). That person keeps running on the same program.

One way that his therapist has for identifying a person's programs is through a word association exercise.  Loving such exercises, I asked him to walk me through it. 

 

First, you pick a word, one that means a great deal to you, one that may be an end that you are striving towards.  He chose "love" when he did the exercise.  I, however, chose Clarity, as it has been an aim of my studies for a ridiculous number of years.

The next step is to write the first 5 words that come to your mind upon thinking of your chosen word.  My word Perception, Deception, Illusion, Clear, and Wholeness.  After writing these 5 words, you write 3 word or phrase associations.  From there you choose one of the three and write three more that you associate with that word.  At some point in this exercise, one of your words will refer back to one of the initial 5 words.  That word shows how you define your main word.  For me, as you can see from the photo above, I eventually wrote out the word "Whole" in response to another word.  This means that for me:

Clarity = Wholeness

The Dreaming

I had a very interesting dream last night.  I dream that I was living in a very cold climate with a small group of other people.  We identified ourselves as "People of the Snow Dragon." We understood that all dragons were of fire, but that these dragons only came when snow covered the ground.

In this dream, I had a familiar.  It was the most beautiful of brown crows.  After waking I decided to look up brown crows, as I was not aware that there was such a thing.  It turns out that there is, but they are identified as caramel crows and are rarer than albino crows.

Interesting......

The Journey

Last night was my first journey with the Women's Shamanic Circle.  Our journey involved healing ancestral burdens.  As such, we did a guided meditation to find out an area in need of healing from the branches of our family tree.  Here is a somewhat detailed account of my journey:

I entered the Lower World in the company of my power animals - Owl, Frog, Bee, and Stag.  We went to meet a "Hollow Bone" ancestor.  Mine was a pleasant surprise to me.  Only a couple short months ago, I met one of my spirit guides.  He was a beautiful, middle-aged Native Indian man.  He told me that his name is Iniri.  I was not aware at that time that he is an ancestor of mine.

Before beginning my journey to find an ancestral burden needing healing, I had a "conversation" with him.  He never actually spoke to me, except to tell me his name - Sitting Eagle. Most of his communication was done via images.  He showed me his life in pictures.  He had a child, not sure the gender, and a beautiful wife.  He lived in the mountains, and he often journeyed alone through them, just taking in the beauty of the world.
 

 

After getting to know him a little better, I asked him to help me show me an issue from my ancestral past.  He took me to a place that was, strangely, in black and white.  Judging from the attire of the people, the time period was late 1800s.  There was a lovely, dapper fellow wearing a fine suit.  He had a vest which had a pocket.  In that pocket, was a pocket watch.  He kept taking it out and looking at it, as if expecting something. All the while, he was pacing. 

Sitting in a chair and rocking back and forth anxiously with her baby, was a woman.  She was very lovely with shoulder length, well coiffed hair.  The scene was that of a very well to-do family.  No one I recognize.  They were obviously anxious and waiting for something - news, person(s), I know not.  Before I could get any sort of explanation for their discomfort, my recently deceased GMa broke into the scene.

Grandma came to me full of love and asking me for forgiveness.  As you know from previous posts, my mother was forcibly taken from her.  She told me that this had resulted in my mother having abandonment issues.  She has also been unable to express her emotions freely.  This resulted in her leaving my sister and I when we were just becoming young ladies. 

I did not blame her for any of this.  These circumstances were out of her control, and the Grandparents that I did grow up with, I would not trade for anything in the universe.  Forgiving her wasn't necessary, as I had not felt any ill toward her to begin with.  I assured her that that particular cycle would end with me.  I would not leave my children physically or mentally or spiritually.  I broke that chain of behavior and all of the emotions associated with it.

After I loved on her for a while, I took my leave and wished her many blessings.  Sitting Eagle then helped me to fully cleanse myself of any residual energy.  To do this, he wrapped me in a blanket, and laid me atop a funeral pyre where I was cleansed by ritual fire.

After thanking my Spirit Guides, I came back.  I realize that there will need to be a second journey soon, as I need to know the message being conveyed to me by the fine young couple from the late 1800s, but for now, I am healed and happy.

In preparation....

Recently, I joined a Women's Shamanism group.  They have had a few meetups since my membership, but I have yet to actually attend.  It is not that I am hesitant, not in the least.  However, with three wee ones and an SO to care for, I have to pick and choose wisely my activities out of the home.

This past week, I received notification that there is a circle planned for this coming Friday (11/11/11 - a powerful day indeed!).  This particular circle is for the purposes of "Healing Ancestral Burdens."  I know not what burdens may be lurking among the branches of my family tree, but I do see the need for such healing, so I considered that this workshop could very well be my formal introduction to this group of Wise Women.

As is my practice, when deciding upon an action such as this, I consult one of my oracles - runes or tarot.  A couple of months ago I purchased the Shadowscapes Tarot, and have been nothing but pleased with it.  The interpretations of the cards, along with the depth of the artist's work are utterly amazing.  They resonate deeply. For this reason, I did a 3 card spread to see what I might gain from attending and participating the Shaman circle.  Here is what I drew.....

1) That which represents my current space in life - Six of Swords..... I am dealing with a bit of grief at the passing of my Grandmother.  I grieve for the loss of a future with her, because I was robbed of much of a past.

2) The card which represents who I will be/where I will be if I go to this circle - The Fool...... This does not mean that I am foolish for attending.  In this deck, the Fool is only just the Beginning, Ground Zero, if you will.  The artwork is of a woman on a precipice looking out into the world.  Will she venture forth with wings like the birds around her, or will she fall from great heights?  I am going to this group for the first time, communing with women I have never met, but who are like minded.  I am at Ground Zero in this relationship.

3) The card that represents the outcome of this journey, should I choose to take it on - Ten of Pentacles......This card represents "the ultimate in worldly success."  Depicted on the face of it is a priestess entangled lovingly in the tail of her dragon companion.  She holds in her hand a seed, the beginning of life.  All around her is intricate stained glass.  From this I draw that any barriers that I have placed before myself, or that have been placed as a result of ancestral burdens, will no longer be there to hinder my success.  My path will be clearer, and I will be that much closer to achieving the goals I have set for myself. This class is likely a catalyst for positive change.

I did this reading in the opposite, with a different deck of cards (The Mystic Faerie Tarot), asking what the outcome would be if I chose not to attend and participate.  Though I did not record the cards that I chose, trust me when I say that all three pointed me in the direction of going.  So, go I shall, and I will record the outcome here.....

The Passing

My grandmother passed away only couple of days ago.Thankfully, I had the opportunity to spend a couple of days with her before she left.  GMa was dying of lung cancer, not suprising as she smoked heavily from the age of 14, but still, it was a gruesome and painful way to go.

I stayed at the hospice with my Grandmother and participated in her care as much as I was able. During that time I wanted confirmation that her suffering was going to end soon. It pained me to see her in constant, unmanageable pain.  I had heard of many terminally ill people who see angels and/or loved ones shortly before passing. This, to me, is confirmation of a peaceful journey after the body dies.

The last night I was in my Grandmother's presence, I sought confirmation of a safe journey for her. I am sensitive and aware, but I often discount my awareness and explain it away. However, I cannot explain away my conversation that night. I spoke with my Grandmother's son George - my Uncle.

I have never met George.  He was murdered by a transient before I found this branch of my family tree.  That night, though, he came to my bedside and told me not to worry.  He said that he would personally see to it that my Grandmother made the journey safely.  He would escort her, and would be there waiting for her to the end. 

My Gma, who up to this point in my visit with her had not had the strength to sit up in bed, got up and walked across the room and sat upon the bed upon which I was laying.  I know not where she got the strength, maybe from George, but she came over and told me she loved me.

My List of 25

Each New Year I do this.... This is what I want to accomplish in the coming year....

Body

• eat better - more raw and organic, less dairy and "white foods"
• Run 1/2 Marathon
• do the Danskin triathlon

Mind

• I will put up boundaries between my work and not allow work to take up all of my time
• I will not lose my Arabic skills, but will devote time to improving

Travel

• I will travel to another continent
• my family and I will visit Oregon and my home

Art

• finish writing my graphic novel
• finish my artist's website
• "Dark Night of the Soul" art show
• copyright my book

Family

• actively strengthen
• I will listen more, daily
• I will spend more quality time with Christopher
• walk the dog more

House

• end the clutter
• plant roses to line the fence
• herb and flower garden expansion

Spirit

• continue to pursue self awareness and improvement diligently (reading, yoga, meditation, practice, etc.)

Business and Entrepreneurial

• Modern Edwardian site launch (integrate Lillies and Lace)

Financial

• pay off credit card
• begin instituting Mark Skousen's "Financial Independence"
• start savings accts. for the kiddos
• begin paying off school loans

Current Workings...

In my quest to further understand and take in the runes I am doing a number of exercises:

First of all, I am working on only two runes at a time, as per the Diana Paxson book. I alternated between the two runes daily.  One day I will chant and meditate on that rune from morn thru dreamtime.  The next day, I work with the other.

My partner and I will do guided meditations about the runes taken from the Gundarsson book - Teutonic Magick.

I will be making my own set of runes by burning them onto wood rounds, blooding them, and applying a natural protective coat of linseed oil.

I am also working on a Kabbalistic correspondence of the runes to their placement on paths of the Tree of Life.

And, I shall read the Havamal and various Rune Poems, making thorough notes of rune spirits and their correspondences.


In these various ways I shall increase my knowledge and understanding of the Runes.

Heart of a Scholar

I have an academic mind.  It is the pursuit of knowledge that excites and thrills me.  I believe that our universe and all of the information in her are like pieces of a giant jigsaw puzzle, we need only put them all into place.  To use another hokey metaphor, all knowledge is part of a giant web.  Everything is connected and leads the seeker to another point within it.  There are a number of seekers within this worlds history that desire to put that last puzzle piece into place, that desire to know the whole of the interconnected web strings.  I am one such person.

Often I have been driven to short periods of madness as the whole spectrum of the knowledge I long to acquire is laid out before me, painting a rather daunting picture.  Still few times I am able to tap into the boundless, experiencing the indescribable.  I have asked myself countless times if it would be an easier path to strive for less, and of course, the answer is yes.  However, I have vowed to myself that that I will never be Content. It is my journey to strive toward Knowing.

As those who know me are aware, I am a perpetual student.  I thrive in the rigorous environs of the academic world. Deadlines do not bother me, and learning many new things all at once works well for me.  That is why I spent almost 7 years pursuing my undergrad degree, and graduated one semester shy of receiving almost as my majors. I would have stayed to finish my last couple of majors, but it seems there is a cap on the amount of financial aid available to one person....

As I stand now, on unfamiliar ground, terrain I have forgotten how to navigate through, I know there is information out there that I must continue to seek, but I have been curious as to where the next bend in the road will take me.  I believe at this juncture, I have found that "bend," and now have a purpose and goal for this stretch of road.  I have an area of study and it encompasses all of the various avenues that I have traveled down.  I am thoroughly overjoyed to embark upon this quest, and more excited still to write about my travels.

 On Samhain, the Witchs' New Year, I shall formally dedicate myself to this task in the year that is coming, or for as long as it shall take. 

Indigo is the Color......

I learned a number of new things yesterday.  It all started with a conversation with my Sisters.  We had come together for our bi-weekly discussion group.  As our conversation topics twisted and turned, we revisited the topic of my "ability" to jack up cell phones and watches just by having them close to my person.  This topic of conversation has been most recently visited due to the fact that I have had 4 different phones in the space of a couple of months. 

When I got home, I decided to use the internet to explore this subject.  What I found is that this is not an entirely heard of phenomenon.  In many ways, this is comforting, to know that I am not delusional.  I now know that there are many folk that are unable to wear watches, or ruin other such electronic equipment.  It turns out that this can also explain other odd occurrences in my world.  People like myself are often called SLIders, which stands for Street Lamp Interference.  This is because when we walk under streetlights they are often effected and turn off, which I can fully relate to.  SLIders also are known to blow out the headlamps on their vehicles, which is terribly strange as it has baffled my SO for a time that our headlights keep going out.  He will replace one, then another will go out..... Odd.....

An article that I happened upon said that SLIders can be Indigo Children.  This was another topic that we touched upon briefly in our discussion group.  I had gone to a market about a year ago with my youngest son.  While wandering through, I stopped at a booth and had a casual conversation with a woman. She told me that my baby and I are Indigo People.  As she was a hippy dippy sort (not a fan), I didn't really consider the information, but went on my merry way after perusing her goods. Last night, however, I remembered that and decided to research Indigo Children.

In my searches I found a checklist of 25 characteristics that indicate one is an Indigo.  Each one I am, all 25.  I guess this makes me an Indigo Child... but what does that even mean?  According to several sources, Indigo Children are merely children whose auras are Indigo from birth. After reading many sources, I think I may have a bit of understanding about "What is and Indigo Child?" 

All the world and all life is connected. Right now, this circle of life is out of balance, and every living being on this planet is aware of that.  Our world is polluted and humans are ravaging every natural resource, to the point of extinction.  We are paving every square inch of our land and destroying the life present there.  I believe that the natural response to a planet and people in distress is, in part, the Indigo Person.  As the body releases antibodies when confronted with a disease, perhaps We are those antibodies, meant to help in setting right the planet and ridd the world of its "disease."   What do you think?

The Whistler

During the last full moon ritual that I took part in, there were a couple of folks that I did not know well.  One of them brought an uninvited "guest" with them.  She had/has a parasitic entity attached to her, which my friend and I happened to see, independently.  Later, we compared stories and found that we had seen the same thing... but that is a different part of the story I am now telling.....

In the course of dealing with this entity, my sister encountered it in between waking and sleep.  It contacted her and she learned a bit about it. As a result of her encounter, I wondered if I might find out something about it myself.  After all, we were all in close proximity of it.

To do this, I sat down to meditate, as I communicate with the "other world" via meditation and my dreams most often.  As I meditated, I meant to make contact with it, and I think I started to. However, someone else answered my "inquiry." 

A very male presence came to me, whistling.  I kept hearing him whistle, all around the room that I was meditating in.  It was only for a little while, and when I came out of my meditation, he was gone.

Today, however, he came back.  When I got home from dropping off my wee ones, I sat down to work.  Shortly after I began my day's tasks, I heard the whistling again.  At first I did not equate the two incidents.  In fact, I tried to ignore the whole thing.  I had work to do, I did not need distractions.  It wasn't until the computer in the other room started playing on the internet, unprompted (I was alone in the house), that I began to get the point.  I realized then that there was someone there trying to contact me.

When I finally got the point, I told the spirit aloud that I would meditate tonight and try to figure out what message he might have for me.  I hope that I am able to understand, because I certainly didn't have much luck earlier in the day.  We shall see.... I may have to ask for more assistance.

The First Entry

This is to be my magickal journal.  The space in which I write down my journey and studies.  I have been studying magick for over 15 years.  My path has taken many different turns, and met many junctions.  However, here I am.

Recently, I have come to work with two very wonderful and amazing women.  Until now, my studies have been mainly solitary.  I have attended many different festivals, and participated in many group rituals, but my studies have been solitary.  Yet, now myself and my two sisters are learning and practicing together - the Power of Three. 

I am blessed, and thankful.